That's When You Know
by Kapowza
Summary: When Jasper manages to escape from Maria his whole perception of life changes. Songfic, pre-Twilight


**OK, This is my first attempt at a songfic. _Italics are the song lyrics, _normal writing is the story.**

_For everyone the story goes_

_There's a special someone to make them whole_

_Someone to give their heart completely_

But I am not everyone. I was cold and malicious. I knew no different, but I wanted to be different. I wished there was someway to stop the hateful feelings from welling up inside me, making me want to hunt. I would have done anything at times to be normal, to be mortal if it meant that I could escape the prison I was constantly enclosed in. I was incapable of making my own decisions most of the time, mindlessly following orders. I decided one day that I needed to get away. Go anywhere. Find a place where I could feel and think for myself, but I was too weak. There was no way for me to escape. Despite the constant changing of my place on the planet there was no way for me to run, to go the opposite way to that which I was being told to go in. I could not think for myself let alone break away from the one who told me what to do. I was locked in a world where death was a constant, and I was the one dealing it out.

_And you may search high and low_

_And when you find your angel and when you know_

_Then you finally get that feeling_

_It'll be as clear as the air you're breathing_

I searched for a way out. When I was able to think for myself, I wondered how to go about escaping. I looked everywhere for an answer. We climbed some of the tallest mountains to escape detection by anyone, occasionally we were forced to hide out at the bottom of an ocean, as a last resort to fool our pursuers. All the time I was taking orders from the only person who had ever shown any compassion towards me. She saved me, but she was always in control, always giving me orders. When I could think for myself, I think I hated her. She kept me a prisoner, suffocated me with her presence but there was nothing I could do about it. She clouded the air around me with false hopes and insecurities.

_That's when the world feels small beneath your feet_

_It's when the stars above are only just out of reach_

_When you feel you're alive for the very first time _

_And there's nothing that you can't rise above_

_That's when you know that you're in love_

We travelled the world so many times in so many years. It felt as if it was too small, too small for there to be a safe place. I began to think that there would never be a place a place where I could be undetected. There seemed to be an endless number of places to hide but nowhere to escape to. Sometimes it felt as if we could travel to outer space and someone would still have been found us among the endless stars. I felt dead, there was too much squashing me down, endless hurdles to struggle past. The concept of freedom was something I did not understand, much like I did not understand the concept of true love.

_And who can tell the time and place_

_When you see your soul reflected in their face_

_It'll be a spell you're under_

_And it'll hit you just like thunder_

We were running through a storm, lightning illuminating patches of the forest around us. The first clap of thunder resonated round the clearing when I caught sight of her face. It was a face of perfection and pity. It seemed to show genuine concern and fright. There was something else there as well. Something I did not understand. I paused in my sprint. Her face cast a spell over me. I was overwhelmed with a sense of sorrow and joy. I knew then that all I wanted for the rest of my life was to stay with this creature. She filled me with hope and her perfection was something that could never be matched in a million years.

'_Cause that's when the world feels small beneath your feet_

_It's when the stars above are only just out of reach_

_When you feel you're alive for the very first time_

_And when you hold them in your arms and can't let go_

_And that's when you know_

All at once the world shrank. It was not small in the same sense it had seemed before. It was no longer a place where you could not find shelter, but rather a place that could not contain the love, for now I knew it to be love that I had for this person. Alice. I felt elated and free. She released me from her grasp. I was no longer imprisoned. I was free and felt so alive. For the first time in my life, I turned my back on everything I knew and joined her in her quest. I had no regrets. I learned to love and learned what unconditional love felt like. No matter what I did, she loved me. Her name, Alice, was a comfort. When she was away from me I would whisper it to myself and wait for her to return, then I would hold her in my arms. When I was at my lowest, she would hold me and I could not let go, even if I had wanted to. That was when I knew that I could not possibly exist if she were ever to go.

_For all my life I have been searching_

_For something I couldn't find_

_But now I know that you are the one_

_I understand, I read the signs_

It had taken me my whole life to find her, or rather for her to find me. I had been searching for something that I could not find, something I did not know I could live without. But know I have found her I know that she is the one. I understand now what I could not even comprehend before. I understand that love is so immense that it has no boundaries.

'_Cause now the world feels small beneath my feet_

_And all the stars above are only just out of reach_

_When you feel you're alive for the very first time_

_And there's nothing that you can't rise above_

_That's when you know that you're in love_

_That's when you know_

The world is too small for us. For our love. If love were to be made solid there would not be enough room in the world, the borders of the universe would not be enough to contain the love that I have for her. I have a new life. A life I can live with her. I have no hurdles I cannot leap with her by my side. I now know, I truly understand, I am in love. I know …

**Please review. I don't mind criticism, but prefer it if it's constructive obviously :)**


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